David Akin's On the Hill :: HUMOUR: Investment tips for 2004

Gemini Award-winning reporter David Akin is the National Affairs Correspondent for Canwest News Service and is based at the CNS Parliamentary Bureau in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada.
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HUMOUR: Investment tips for 2004

by DavidAkin on Fri 16 Jan 2004 10:45 AM EST | Permanent Link | Cosmos

This was passed my way by one of CTV's business editors: 2004 could be the year to get in on the ground floor of these mergers, sure to be big money-makers:

Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.
Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner Cracker.
3M will merge with Goodyear and issue forth as: MMMGood.
Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa.
FedEx is expected to join its major competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.
Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild.
Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: Poupon Pants.
Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW!

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